Experts believe that Harbhajan will fail to qualify for the final race as his Hummer can't match the pace of Formula One cars. But the off-spinner, confident of winning the race, said: It's not pace but spin that matters in Indian conditions!
Please note: This is a humorous piece – pure fiction.Harbhajan Singh, who was dropped from the Indian cricket team against West Indies, has decided to mark his presence in the field of sports by taking part in the inaugural Indian Grand Prix. Harbhajan Singh will be the first Formula One driver in the world to drive a Hummer SUV. "Bhajji", as Harbhajan is fondly called, has reportedly been granted permission to take part in the race. "We have allowed Harbhajan to drive his Hummer on F1 track to attract crowds," one of the organisers of The Grand Prix of India informed. "We already had two IPL owners – Sahara India and Vijay Mallya – owning an F1 team, but we needed some star power. Harbhajan brings that to the table." Sources suggest that Indian Grand Prix organisers were wary of losing money if the F1 race failed to attract the attention of the average Indian sports fan. Earlier, the organisers had planned music concerts by Metallica and Lady Gaga before and after the race respectively, however they felt the need to do something similar during the race. "Cricketers are back in demand after 5-0 whitewash of England," a source explained why F1 organisers decided to let Harbhajan drive his Hummer. "Harbhajan was the cheapest option after we failed to convince Ravindra Jadeja," the source added. As per the planned events, Harbhajan will take part in the practice and the qualifying races, and will be allowed to take part in the final race if he performs well in the earlier rounds. While experts believe that Harbhajan will fail to qualify for the final race as his Hummer can’t match the pace of Formula One cars, the off-spinner is confident of winning the race. "It’s not pace but spin that matters in Indian conditions," Harbhajan said. F1 organisers have refused to comment on the Indian conditions, but they are hoping that Harbhajan would be able to attract crowds and garner revenues for the event. Sources inform that Uttar Pradesh Chief Minister Mayawati has already warned the organisers that she will not tolerate any loss from the event. "After Bhatta Parsaul incident, Mayawati is in no mood to suffer any loss over F1," a source told Faking News, "Initially she had ordered the organisers to install 'toll booths’ after each kilometer on the F1 track, and recover the cost from the drivers, as is usually done in UP to recover costs." Deeply concerned over the possibility of reputed drivers like Sebastian Vettel being beaten up to recover chanda (contributions) to recover the costs, F1 organisers are believed to have come up with the idea of involving a cricketer to raise money. (Rahul Roushan, is graduate from IIM Ahmedabad, who goes by the name of "Pagal Patrakar" (that’s "Crazy Journalist" in Hindi). Rahul says for him, "satire is an attempt to point out shortcomings or oddities in our society, ideally with a message and intent for betterment, in a non-hostile manner and without sounding overtly accusative or pontificating." He is the Managing Editor of www.fakingnews.com from where the above article has been sourced with permission)
